Written by Helen Thomas
Context: Stories Are Immortal is a patchwork of quotes, essentially an erasure poem on a larger scale. All the works in this piece have inspired my writing, and I wanted to see whether I could create a unique work while using their words, rather than just using them as inspiration. This piece includes quotes from Arcane (seasons 1 and 2) by various writers and directors, Tallow by Karen Brooks, Too Sweet by Hozier, Circe by Madeline Miller, The Hidden Oracle by Rick Riordan, and Back to the Future by Robert Zemeckis.
I was among the least of the lesser goddesses. Our powers were so modest they could scarcely ensure Our eternities.1 I was a terrible god.2 But I didn’t know how to be anything else.3
Apparently, I’d overstepped.4 Some incomprehensible slight.5 But the grudges of gods are as deathless as Their flesh.6 The punishment of a god was a rare and terrible thing, and talk ran wild through Our halls.7
I waited.8 The doorway was empty. Then at once it was not.9 Every line of Her body was beautiful, perfect with grace.10
‘What do you have to say to me?’11 She asked.12
‘I don’t know. I didn’t do anything.’13
‘I expect better from you than excuses.’14
They wanted me gone,15 for no reason I could name.16 Rage, fear, grief, and a sense of anticipation warred within me.17 Maybe the true surprise, I thought, was that it had not happened sooner.18
‘Don’t look so concerned. I’m about to make your day,’19 She said.20
There was a twisting feeling in my chest, like cloth being wrung dry.21 A flash in the room, searing as the fire’s heart.22
*
The burning in my brain matched the fire in my body.23 I held my arm up and twisted it to expose pale blue veins that striped my white inner flesh.24
‘Blood,’ I muttered.25 ‘I was a god. I did not have blood.’26 My voice sounded hollow and desperate.27
I’m completely mortal.28
How had it come to this?29 I felt helpless, ashamed, completely vulnerable—publicly and brutally stripped of everything that made me a god.30
I knew that there were things worse than death.31 I stood there a long time fearing such things and waiting, as if someone would come down and reassure me, say yes, you may go, it will be safe.32 I didn’t know what to do.33 Mortal fears and needs clouded my thoughts.34 I made myself look around.35
It was past sundown by then.36 I passed by shuttered shops and houses, folk travelling home, and the occasional stray cat.37
I approached them.38 ‘Please, if you could spare anything, I would be extremely grateful.’39 I was all but invisible.40
‘Excuse me.’41 I turned.42 The girl was a pretty blonde, with grey-green eyes and a thin mouth.43 ‘Can I help?’44
‘I need a place to shelter till the storm passes.’45
The girl smiled.46 ‘Let’s talk inside.’47
The place had a tiny living room with an attached kitchen and a single hallway leading to what I assumed were the bedrooms.48
‘You’ll help me?’49 I asked softly.50 The girl nodded.51 ‘Thank you for your kindness,’52 I said.53 ‘I don’t even know your name.’54
‘It’s Thalia. Who are you?’55
I found myself hesitating,56 but even after all the years that had passed, there was a piece of me that still only spoke what I was bid.57 ‘I must tell you,58 I used to be a god.’59 She was staring at me, but I did not stop.60 ‘I have no powers,61 and as you’ve seen, immortality can be taken away.’62
‘I need proof.63 You might be any country girl.’64
I had no answers to give her.65
Thalia was silent a long moment.66 ‘Why were you punished?’67
‘She said it was what I deserved.68 I grew up knowing I’m less than Them, that my place is down here.’69 Then I saw the look in her eyes.70 Mortals had their own stories, after all, of what happened to those who mixed with gods.71 ‘You seem nervous.’72
‘Will you be bringing a god’s wrath down upon my head?’73
‘My problems should not affect you,’74 I said.75
‘You need rest—lots of it.76 I do not think a month should be too long.’77 The kindness in Thalia’s voice brought tears to my eyes.78
‘Thank you.’79
I couldn’t believe how, from one day to the next, my whole life had transformed—and this was only the beginning.80 Besides, as the hours passed, I remembered less and less of my divine life.81
*
If you had asked me, I would have said I was happy.82 Less than a month we had spent together, yet Thalia seemed to know me better than anyone who had ever walked the world.83 The truth is, I had begun to wonder if Thalia was in love with me.84
I was so caught up in the joy of my new life that I missed what was happening right under my nose.85
A slight hush, like an intake of breath, and there He was.86 One of the other gods.87 I studied His face.88
‘What are You doing here?’89 I demanded.90
He was not polished and perfect, but He was the same all the way through.91 ‘I assume you’ve heard.’92 I shook my head.93
He knelt before me, His eyes on the ground.94 ‘We are sorry.95 Things changed when you left. We changed.96 We knew about fading,97 but it happened in so short a time.98 We need you.’99
‘Why does She need me?’ I asked.100
‘You have a power greater than Our own.101 We continue to exist because of you.102 It is impossible for Us to fade completely.’103
I had never been given such deference in my life.104 ‘Rise,’ I told Him.105 ‘I’m not ready to go back.’106
‘You would dare to stay?’107
‘I wanted to have a home.108 Now I have found one.’109
‘I didn’t realise you were so close,’110 He said.111 ‘You barely know each other.’112
‘I know what I owe Thalia.’113
‘You have always trusted too easily.114 Have you learned from your past mistakes?’115
He was waiting for my reaction.116 ‘Will You let us have a little peace?’117
He grinned.118 ‘You really are fond of the mortal.119 I’ll give Her your regards.’120 He laughed and vanished.121
‘So much for happy reunions,’122 I muttered.123
‘Who are you talking to?’124
I glanced over my shoulder.125 ‘You heard Him?’126
Thalia nodded.127
‘That was an old friend.128 They want to bring me back home.’129
‘Do you want to?’130
‘I don’t know.’131
‘Surely They would give you some sort of acknowledgement, a word of kindness, They are your family, after all.’132
‘My family cast me out and yet, part of me still loves Them.’133 I rubbed my throbbing temples.134 ‘I need to think.’135
I rose and stole onto the rooftop.136 Sitting on the edge I gazed out over the city.137
I was happy with the way things were,138 but I could not stand the idea of abandoning Them.139 My sense of guilt seemed to have expanded as my lifespan contracted.140 I could’ve passed a lifetime without ever facing a choice like this.141 Whatever happens, it’s on me.142
But while in this world,143 I had allowed myself, for the first time in memory, to feel—not only my body, but my real self.144 They’d known all along I was different, that I belonged in another place, another time.145
I would not live that way again.146 Let Them learn the world is not as They think.147
I felt reckless, but also liberated in a way I had not known before.148 I shivered.149
Perhaps I deserved my present form.150 A voice whispered in the back of my mind.151
‘Stop,’ I told myself.152 It wasn’t safe here, on the edge.153
The air crawled across my skin and the shadows reached out their hands,154 holding me, whispering in low tones to be let in.155 I felt an idea rise in me.156 I imagined pitching over that ledge into the open air below. It would feel good, I thought, before I hit.157 My body, with its simple good sense, baulked at self-destruction.158
‘There is no must to the life of a mortal, except death,’159 I heard myself say.160 As I spoke, Her words seemed to whisper beneath mine.161
‘Sometimes death is a mercy.162 Perhaps this is how it was meant to be. In the stories, gods and mortals never joined for long.’163
I stood and faced the mountains.164 I took a step towards the edge,165 guided by an invisible hand,166 but just as I did, something brushed against me.167
Thalia wrapped her arms around me.168 ‘Am I interrupting?’169 Thalia’s voice was like a balm upon my raw skin.170 I pulled back from the edge.171 It felt like a fever breaking. ‘What happened?’172 Thalia asked.173
I tried to take stock of what had just occurred.174 Recalling the thoughts that had filled my head, I couldn’t understand where they’d come from.175 I had felt another will at work within me.176
She had tried to kill me.177
I didn’t want to scare Thalia.178 ‘I had a vision.’179 I could feel that my life was about to change again.180 I knew what I wanted to do was a gamble, but I was ready to start making my own decisions.181 ‘I’m not going anywhere.’182
‘If you take this path, They will despise you.’183
I was not the same as I had been. ‘I owe Her nothing.184 But I can’t do this alone.’185
Thalia smiled.186 ‘We’ll get through this.’187
*
I spoke Her name, and She was summoned.188 She may not have been immortal anymore, but She still had a grace about Her that I could not fathom.189
‘I let her save your life.190 I thought you might want to know,191 that was the least of my powers.’192 How easily the lies tripped off the end of Her tongue.193 She was shaking uncontrollably.194 ‘You must come home and take your place at my side.’195
I would not let Her use me.196 ‘I wish I could go along,197 but what if we stayed?’198
There was something fierce in Her expression.199 She hated this great world and everything in it, and me, so it seemed, most of all.200
‘You’d sacrifice everything that We are.201 I will not sentence myself to such a living death.’202 She stood fixed in her outrage, bright and defiant.203 I’d never known Her to be scared before.204 Her gaze fell.205 ‘I need you. Please.’206
‘It’s Your fault really.207 You threw me to the crows, but it turns out I prefer them to You.’208
Thalia stepped forward.209 ‘Who wants to live forever?’210 She smiled.211 ‘You’ll learn to love it.’212
She who had lived so many lifetimes, seen and felt so much—I’d never seen Her cry before.213
She vanished and did not return.214
*
All gods fear death, even when We are not encased in mortal forms.215 I thought once that gods were the opposite of death, but I see now that They are more dead than anything, for They are unchanging, and can hold nothing in Their hands.216
Thalia saved my life,217 helped me understand what it was I’d become.218
I don’t know how long this mortal life will be, but I intend to live fully and without fear.219 I can choose what kind of story it’s going to be.220
Footnotes
1(Miller, 2018, p. 1)
2(Riordan, 2016, p. 234)
3(Brooks, 2009, p. 66)
4(Dunne, 2021, 33:45)
5(Miller, 2018, p. 128)
6(Miller, 2018, p. 12)
7(Miller, 2018, p. 13)
8(Brooks, 2009, p. 20)
9(Miller, 2018, p. 14)
10(Miller, 2018, p. 200)
11(Miller, 2018, p. 77)
12(Riordan, 2016, p. 79)
13(Linke & Yee, 2021a, 14:02)
14(Dunne, 2021, 17:57)
15(Miller, 2018, p. 169)
16(Miller, 2018, p. 168)
17(Brooks, 2009, p. 154)
18(Miller, 2018, p. 168)
19(Luddington, 2021a, 19:46)
20(Riordan, 2016, p. 45)
21(Miller, 2018, p. 8)
22(Miller, 2018, p. 25)
23(Brooks, 2009, p. 276)
24(Brooks, 2009, p. 186)
25(Riordan, 2016, p. 8)
26(Riordan, 2016, p. 9)
27(Riordan, 2016, p. 3)
28(Riordan, 2016, p. 89)
29(Brooks, 2009, p. 198)
30(Riordan, 2016, p. 2)
31(Brooks, 2009, p. XVI)
32(Miller, 2018, p. 68)
33(Brooks, 2009, p. 219)
34(Riordan, 2016, p. 22)
35(Miller, 2018, p. 67)
36(Miller, 2018, p. 69)
37(Brooks, 2009, p. 131)
38(Brooks, 2009, p. 278)
39(Brooks, 2009, p. 127)
40(Brooks, 2009, p. 278)
41(Dunne, 2021, 04:43)
42(Miller, 2018, p. 16)
43(Brooks, 2009, p. 116)
44(Yee, 2021, 03:09)
45(Miller, 2018, p. 80)
46(Miller, 2018, p. 79)
47(Riordan, 2016, p. 92)
48(Riordan, 2016, p. 27)
49(Brooks, 2009, p. 179)
50(Brooks, 2009, p. 178)
51(Riordan, 2016, p. 13)
52(Miller, 2018, p. 17)
53(Miller, 2018, p. 45)
54(Luddington, 2021a, 33:33)
55(Riordan, 2016, p. 79)
56(Miller, 2018, p. 229)
57(Miller, 2018, p. 163)
58(Brooks, 2009, p. 117)
59(Riordan, 2016, p. 1)
60(Miller, 2018, p. 150)
61(Riordan, 2016, p. 352)
62(Riordan, 2016, p. 60)
63(Brannon, 2021, 07:58)
64(Miller, 2018, p. 79)
65(Riordan, 2016, p. 88)
66(Miller, 2018, p. 150)
67(Miller, 2018, p. 17)
68(Miller, 2018, p. 8)
69(Luddington, 2021a, 29:53)
70(Brooks, 2009, p. 2)
71(Miller, 2018, p. 26-27)
72(Zemeckis, 1985, 01:17:46)
73(Miller, 2018, p. 281)
74(Riordan, 2016, p. 84)
75(Brooks, 2009, p. 1)
76(Brooks, 2009, p. 51)
77(Miller, 2018, p. 185)
78(Brooks, 2009, p. 51)
79(Riordan, 2016, p. 264)
80(Brooks, 2009, p. 81-82)
81(Riordan, 2016, p. 108)
82(Miller, 2018, p. 87)
83(Miller, 2018, p. 326)
84(Miller, 2018, p. 46)
85(Brooks, 2009, p. 111)
86(Brooks, 2009, p. 152)
87(Miller, 2018, p. 15)
88(Riordan, 2016, p. 81)
89(Brannon, 2021, 20:27)
90(Riordan, 2016, p. 81)
91(Miller, 2018, p. 196)
92(Linke & Yee, 2021a, 29:42)
93(Miller, 2018, p. 34)
94(Miller, 2018, p. 248)
95(Miller, 2018, p. 171)
96(Yee, 2021, 34:15)
97(Riordan, 2016, p. 60)
98(Brooks, 2009, p. 383)
99(Brannon, 2021, 36:30)
100(Riordan, 2016, p. 161)
101(Miller, 2018, p. 39)
102(Riordan, 2016, p. 251)
103(Riordan, 2016, p. 273)
104(Miller, 2018, p. 99)
105(Miller, 2018, p. 33)
106(Brooks, 2009, p. 257)
107(Miller, 2018, p. 83)
108(Riordan, 2016, p. 343)
109(Miller, 2018, p. 169)
110(Yee, 2021, 06:58)
111(Riordan, 2016, p. 217)
112(Riordan, 2016, p. 39)
113(Miller, 2018, p. 131)
114(Miller, 2018, p. 65)
115(Riordon, 2016, p. 170)
116(Miller, 2018, p. 86)
117(Miller, 2018, p. 197)
118(Miller, 2018, p. 234)
119(Linke & Yee, 2021b, 07:00)
120(Overton, 2021, 35:03)
121(Miller, 2018, p. 89)
122(Linke & Yee, 2024, 20:42)
123(Riordan, 2016, p. 72)
124(Riordan, 2016, p. 327)
125(Brooks, 2009, p. XII)
126(Linke & Yee, 2021a, 34:44)
127(Riordan, 2016, p. 13)
128(Miller, 2018, p. 234)
129(Zemeckis, 1985, 00:49:13)
130(Zemeckis, 1985, 00:56:40)
131(Brooks, 2009, p. 346)
132(Miller, 2018, p. 15)
133(Luddington, 2021b, 07:49)
134(Riordan, 2016, p. 88)
135(Luddington, 2021b, 24:59)
136(Brooks, 2009, p. 140)
137(Brooks, 2009, p. 121)
138(Brooks, 2009, p. 269)
139(Riordan, 2016, p. 303)
140(Riordan, 2016, p. 184)
141(Brannon, 2021, 01:41)
142(Linke & Yee, 2021a, 25:41)
143(Hozier-Bryne, 2024)
144(Brooks, 2009, p. 53)
145(Brooks, 2009, p. 32)
146(Miller, 2018, p. 158)
147(Miller, 2018, p. 169)
148(Brooks, 2009, p. 117)
149(Brooks, 2009, p. 122)
150(Riordan, 2016, p. 342)
151(Riordan, 2016, p. 111)
152(Miller, 2018, p. 70)
153(Brooks, 2009, p. XII)
154(Miller, 2018, p. 70)
155(Brannon, 2021, 00:55)
156(Miller, 2018, p. 113)
157(Miller, 2018, p. 67)
158(Miller, 2018, p. 246)
159(Miller, 2018, p. 245)
160(Miller, 2018, p. 314)
161(Miller, 2018, p. 278)
162(St. John & St. John, 2021, 08:36)
163(Miller, 2018, p. 204)
164(Brooks, 2009, p. 122)
165(Luddington, 2021a, 31:31)
166(Linke & Yee, 2024, 17:01)
167(Brooks, 2009, p. 205)
168(Brooks, 2009, p. 291)
169(Luddington, 2021a, 31:53)
170(Miller, 2018, p. 129)
171(Luddington, 2021a, 31:55)
172(Dunne, 2021, 18:28)
173(Riordan, 2016, p. 46)
174(Brooks, 2009, p. 154)
175(Brooks, 2009, p. 171)
176(Linke & Yee, 2024, 00:57)
177(Miller, 2018, p. 216)
178(Brannon, 2021, 14:01)
179(Overton, 2021, 13:30)
180(Brooks, 2009, p. 336)
181(Brooks, 2009, p. 138)
182(Yee, 2021, 35:32)
183(Luddington, 2021b, 06:09)
184(Miller, 2018, p. 83)
185(Riordan, 2016, p. 294)
186(Miller, 2018, p. 79)
187(Luddington, 2021b, 06:09)
188(Miller, 2018, p. 258)
189(Riordan, 2016, p. 357)
190(St. John & St. John, 2021, 16:32)
191(Miller, 2018, p. 89)
192(Miller, 2018, p. 58)
193(Brooks, 2009, p. 130)
194(Brooks, 2009, p. 23)
195(Linke & Yee, 2021b, 08:26)
196(Riordan, 2016, p. 185)
197(Hozier-Bryne, 2024)
198(Linke & Yee, 2024, 13:34)
199(Riordan, 2016, p.10)
200(Miller, 2018, p. 213)
201(Brannon, 2021, 12:17)
202(Miller, 2018, p. 150)
203(Miller, 2018, p. 151)
204(Brooks, 2009, p. 196)
205(Miller, 2018, p. 5)
206(Brannon, 2021, 36:30)
207(Dunne, 2021, 05:12)
208(Miller, 2018, p. 77)
209(Miller, 2018, p. 128)
210(Hozier-Bryne, 2024)
211(Miller, 2018, p. 79)
212(Linke & Yee, 2021a, 23:21)
213(Brooks, 2009, p. 190)
214(Miller, 2018, p. 159)
215(Riordan, 2016, p. 60)
216(Miller, 2018, p. 333)
217(Yee, 2021, 06:50)
218(Brooks, 2009, p. 255)
219(Riordan, 2016, p. 358)
220(Riordan, 2016, p. 346)
Bibliography
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Brooks, K. (2009) Tallow. Random House Australia.
Dunne, D. (Writer), Charrue, P. (Director), Combe, J. (Director), & Delord, A. (Director). (2021, November 13). Happy Progress Day! (Season 1, Episode 4) [TV Series episode]. In C. Linke & A. Yee (Executive Producers), Arcane. Netflix.
Hozier-Bryne, A. (2024). Too Sweet. On Unreal Unearth. Rubyworks & Island Records.
Linke, C. (Writer), Yee. A (Writer), Charrue, P. (Director), Combe, J. (Director), & Delord, A. (Director). (2021a, November 6). Welcome to the Playground (Season 1, Episode 1) [TV Series episode]. In C. Linke & A. Yee (Executive Producers), Arcane. Netflix.
Linke, C. (Writer), Yee. A (Writer), Charrue, P. (Director), Combe, J. (Director), & Delord, A. (Director). (2021b, November 20). The Monster You Created (Season 1, Episode 9) [TV Series episode]. In C. Linke & A. Yee (Executive Producers), Arcane. Netflix.
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Luddington, N. (Writer), Charrue, P. (Director), Combe, J. (Director), & Delord, A. (Director). (2021a, November 6). Some Mysteries Are Better Left Unsolved (Season 1, Episode 2) [TV Series episode]. In C. Linke & A. Yee (Executive Producers), Arcane. Netflix.
Luddington, N. (Writer), Charrue, P. (Director), Combe, J. (Director), & Delord, A. (Director). (2021b, November 20). The Boy Savior (Season 1, Episode 7) [TV Series episode]. In C. Linke & A. Yee (Executive Producers), Arcane. Netflix.
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Overton, A. (Writer), Charrue, P. (Director), Combe, J. (Director), & Delord, A. (Director). (2021, November 13). Everybody Wants to Be My Enemy (Season 1, Episode 5) [TV Series episode]. In C. Linke & A. Yee (Executive Producers), Arcane. Netflix.
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Yee, A. (Writer), Charrue, P. (Director), Combe, J. (Director), & Delord, A. (Director). (2021, November 13). When These Walls Come Tumbling Down (Season 1, Episode 6) [TV Series episode]. In C. Linke & A. Yee (Executive Producers), Arcane. Netflix.
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Author Bio:
Hi, I’m Helen (they/them)! I’m following my passions as a third-year creative writing student at QUT. I love reading and writing fantasy, romance, and science fiction, as well as any kind of queer stories. I also love playing and watching video games on YouTube, along with viewing discussions of films and psychology.